December 15th, 1989
Went shopping with mum and felt sad knowing I’ll be away for Christmas (on a trip with Frankie that will, no doubt, be very interesting!) Mum mentioned more than once that Christmas won’t be the same without not only me around, but also Nana.
I have lovely memories of helping Nana wrap our gifts, then feigning surprise when I opened mine on the day.
“It’s just what I wanted,” I’d say, laughing.
“I’m so glad you like it, hen,” Nana would say, avoiding eye contact with me for fear of cracking up laughing.
I do feel bad I won’t be here, especially this year, where things have been difficult for mum and dad but more than ever I know it’s time for me to move out. I’ve been thinking about Christopher’s offer of helping me get set up somewhere in New York in an apartment that I’d rent (no way could I afford to buy there.) I still love the idea of buying a place in France but New York captures (and holds!) my attention unlike anywhere else and I can imagine “popping in,” to see Christopher (the only person I’d know in New York!) on my days off.
I know plenty of cabin crew who commute, ok maybe not to New York but with the short flight time, I think I could make it work.